Changing Views on Motherhood

Today marks the anniversary of the Roe v. Wade decision. What a sad day in our nation's history. I have always had a soft spot in my heart for the abortion issue because it has always been my understanding that life begins at conception. And the termination of a pregnancy is a termination of a life.

Last year, at the DC March for Life I was exposed to dozens of stories of mothers & fathers who regretted their abortions. It had an extreme impact on me and really demonstrated the many more victims affected by this horrific Supreme Court decision.

Then more recently, I had a change of heart on the significance of motherhood.

MY EARLY PERSPECTIVE

I was raised to value the sanctity of human life and abortion was never an option (except possibly in the cases of rape and incest). Not much was said about birth control except abstinence was the best way to avoid pregnancy. Beyond that I never paid much attention to having children, since I wasn't married.

Then I got married.

I wanted children, so birth control was never a consideration. So, within the first six months I was blessed with the news of a double pink line: a baby!

AFTER BABY #1

After she was born, I was instructed to refrain from sexual intercourse for the first six weeks, but I needed to start thinking about whether or not I wanted to have another child right away.

In my fairy tale mind, I always thought it would be good to space the children apart...about two years was good. However I didn't feel comfortable with the idea of using contraceptives because it seemed so unnatural, so I stuck with what worked my whole single life. Abstinence. Of course, that didn't work very well for my marriage.

Within a few months I became pregnant again. Oops, I messed up in my counting. The timing couldn't have been worse. We had just moved, our old house wasn't ready to leave, our new house wasn't ready to move in, we moved in with my parents, I left my job, my husband left his business, we started a brand new business in a brand new industry, and I was majorly depressed. Not good timing at all.

AFTER BABY #2

After he was born, I had no problem with the doctor's orders to abstain. These children were 15 months apart. But then my allotted recovery time was over and my wifely duty was expected to kick back in. Again, I relied on the calendar, and goofed in my math. The big joke was how fertile I was.

I'd like to say we were excited about the double pink line this time, but I was in over my head with the two I already had. This was such bad timing. And to top it off my condition was frowned upon by my own mother. I was devastated. We didn't initially tell anybody else I was pregnant because frankly I didn't want to have to go through the same discouragement I felt after my mother's comments. We figured we'd just wait. It would be obvious soon enough.

After a few prenatal visits, there appeared to be a problem. My doctor could not hear a fetal heartbeat. I was told it could just be the position of the baby. So we scheduled another visit. Again, nothing. By this time, I was getting concerned. An ultrasound was scheduled.

My husband joined me for the sonogram. I saw the baby on the monitor. By this time I was a pro at pointing out certain features. Of course this was much earlier in the term than my previous tests, but I could see the heart. It was not beating.

Boy, for not wanting to be pregnant again at this early point in my marriage, the realization of that miscarriage was devastating. My husband consoled me, stating God had other plans. After the initial emotional shock, I was able to accept the fate of this child. But this experience made me treasure the miracle of the lives of my other children all the more.

AFTER BABY #3

Ten months later, after a very rocky road of counting, abstaining and giving in, we were greeted with the news of yet another double pink line. While my mother still made comments over the number of children I was having, I reminded her I had just as many as she did. The only difference was our age. By this time I was almost 38 years old. She was concerned about the health risks (understandably so). I was grateful we were blessed with another child. I came to appreciate every moment of this pregnancy.

During the final trimester God blessed us with a new church family. It was close to home, it met my need for spiritual growth and it was a very family-friendly environment. (The pastor had eight kids of his own.) This new-found appreciation for multiple children was so refreshing.

From the time he was born, he was cherished by all those around. I truly felt blessed by not only the miracle of life, but healthy, perfectly formed babies. Oh, how grateful I was.

AFTER BABY #4

As time passed, either my counting improved, my eggs got old or my abstinence grew, because I remained pregnant-free for more than a year, the longest stretch of time in my seven years of marriage. Unfortunately my anxiety level was going through the roof. I was so afraid of getting pregnant again.

I kept thinking of... having to start all over again, the growing health risks...and what would my mother think. I just could not bear the thought of having another child. Naturally, this put a strain on my marriage. Because I relied heavily on the most effective birth control method I knew.

Then God started working on my heart. Okay, maybe the work began long before, but I started recognizing that my having more children was not my decision to make. It was the Creator of mankind's.

You see, he ordained the institutions of marriage and family. His plan was for a man and woman to become one. It was His intention for us to be fruitful and multiply. He opens and closes wombs, and it is He who knits bodies together in a mother's womb.

My decision to methodically determine when not to meet my husband's needs, not only caused my marriage to suffer, I believe it grieved the heart of God. I was elevating myself to His level in attempting to orchestrate the blessing of conception, and this was so wrong.

I surrendered my will to His and stopped keeping track. I worked on becoming the best help meet God created me to be for my husband, and I left the miracle of life in His hands.

There was a point several months ago I thought I might have conceived. To say I was overjoyed would be a lie, but I wasn't dreading the possibility either. At that point my greatest inhibition was what my mother would say, but I figured God would help me through it.

It was a false alarm, but it caused my husband and I to talk about the possibilities, and it opened my mind to reconsider the sanctity of marriage and family and the sovereignty of God.

BIBLICAL PERSPECTIVE

"Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward." - Psalm 127:3 KJV

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb." - Psalm 139:13 NIV

"My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth," - Psalm 139:15 NIV

"Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." - Psalm 139:16 NIV

"Thy hands have made me and fashioned me: give me understanding, that I may learn thy commandments." - Psalm 119:73 KJV

"Know ye that the LORD he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture." - Psalm 100:3 KJV

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

MY CURRENT PERSPECTIVE

I watched a DVD this past year called, Fearfully and Wonderfully Made and it fascinated me to watch how miraculous conception really is. The path taken by the sperm to fertilize an egg and all of its obstacles. The cell division and DNA code kept in tact. Absolutely remarkable.

It was always my understanding that it was the mother and father's doing, creating new life. After all we are made in the image of God...we have the ability to procreate. But then I've come to realize even the animals and plant life can procreate. It is God who made us, not we ourselves. It is He who knits us together in our mothers' wombs. And all the days that were ordained for us were written before they came to be. God is God, and I am not.

With this new realization of the Creator's hand in the lives of my children, the severity of the choice to end that life at any time is magnified. God miraculously causes conception after the sexual union of a man and woman. He uniquely fashions the child every step of the way in the womb. He has plans to give us hope and a future...all of us...every life He creates.

Who are we to snuff that life out...whether it be before or after conception? God have mercy on us all.

EDIT 12/24/14: At the time of this writing I was really hurt by my mother's reaction to my getting pregnant so often. Her concern I believe was over my age...I was 34 with my first child. While it really was a cause for stress in my life at the time, I have forgiven her.

Affordable Health Care: Not a Moral Right

In the 9/24/09 issue of the Fluvanna Review someone stated, "Affordable health care is every American's moral right" and proceeded to reference the popular parable of "The Good Samaritan" and a quote from Christ. She asked if Jesus walked our streets today, teaching His parables, would He be branded as a socialist and jeered.

The problem I see with correlations such as these between Christ's teachings and social justice is the assumption that Christ was teaching these lessons to governmental institutions, but He wasn't. He was speaking to individuals, specifically His followers. It is not the Federal Government's role to "love their neighbor", but rather it is the role of Christians.

None of us are due bandaged wounds, continued care and a comfy bed all at the expense of another. Parables such as "The Good Samaritan" are talking about the voluntary expression of love and mercy toward one another.

While God has created all men equal and given us the inalienable rights to life and liberty as recognized by our founding fathers, He did not give us the "right" to affordable health care, and the US Constitution does not give the power to our government to bestow "affordable health care" on all Americans. The proper role of government is to protect equal rights, not provide equal things.

As for Christ being a socialist, absolutely not. He never taught to "steal from the rich to give to the poor".

Our federal government should not be taking money from select portions of society to redistribute to others in order to "make things fair". America is a free market economy and the only way for us to thrive as a nation is to minimize governmental regulations and let the market do its thing.

Affordable health care is not every American's moral right.

Fluvanna BOS: Public Prayer vs Moment of Silence

I spoke during the initial public comments section of this afternoon's (9/2/09) BOS meeting. Here's what I had to say:

My name is Carrie Wigal. I live at [edited for privacy purposes].

About a month or so ago there was an article in the Central Virginian that featured my plea to you to put prayer back into your public meetings. To be honest it surprised me that it received media coverage that long after my comments were made. But I read that piece and could hardly believe Attorney Tom Paine’s response. It was reported that he advised you a moment of silence would be more appropriate than prayer because he was afraid of litigation that might come as a result of public prayer in your meetings.

I have to tell you, I laughed out loud when I read this. Because as you know, my father, Doug Johnson is currently suing you for your failure to order a referendum over the formation of the Joint Water Authority. Your very own Mr. Ott warned you all at the public hearing in March that litigation might ensue if you didn’t act on the petitions of the people. Your attorney obviously didn’t fear that litigation when he advised you to disregard the two sets of petitions. So, needless to say, that particular statement struck me as rather funny.

But after my chuckle subsided, I thought to myself why does this man fear men over God? Wouldn’t God’s wrath cause more harm than some disgruntled citizen? Why are we more concerned about offending people than we are of offending the Almighty? Where are the priorities here?

Shortly after this article hit the newsstands I discovered that you all voted unanimously to include a moment of silence in your public agendas – and some thought I should be proud of my participation in getting this issue to the forefront. But I have to tell you, I was more proud of getting my concerns on the front page of the paper.

A moment of silence? My initial response…You all actually voted to have a moment of silence in your meetings? You already have a multitude of moments of silence in your meetings – everybody just needs to stop talking for a minute at the same time, and voila! There’s your moment of silence – you didn’t have to vote on it! This is crazy.

What purpose does this moment serve? Are you honoring fallen soldiers or mourning the loss of a loved one? – Or are you just trying to gather your thoughts for the next subject at hand? Maybe your honest intention was to allow individuals to pray if they chose to do so before you proceeded with your agendas. And I believe it was your honest intention. But, individuals can pray whenever they want – they don’t need a public “moment of silence” to permit that.

So many thoughts raced through my mind upon my hearing this news, but the most significant one was how much of a slap in the face to God this was.

Who do you think you’re fooling? Why are you afraid to talk to Him in public? Oh, it’s okay to publicly pledge allegiance to our nation – under God…and tender money publicly claiming we put our trust in God, but we just can’t publicly talk to Him. Can you see the lunacy in this?

He is the Creator of the Universe! When the sun goes down and you gaze up into the sky, marveling at the blanket of lights visible to the naked eye, know that he breathed them into existence…and the size of this little planet here pales in comparison to many of the stars flying around out there. Yet he knows each and every one of us. He knows the number of hairs on our head at any given moment of the day, and He knows our innermost thoughts, desires and fears. He designed us – and He loves us – even when we screw up!

God wants good things for us – He wants to help us. We have so much evidence in our nation’s history of his divine intervention. The Revolutionary War was won because He stepped in as a result of prayer. The huge success in the birth and life of our nation is a direct result of His providence and our recognition of Him and obedience to His laws. The Abolition of Slavery was realized because He intervened on the hearts of men.

God is real – He is all-knowing, all-powerful and willing to give wisdom to those who ask Him. He sees the big picture. He knows what goes on in the homes and hearts of every citizen in this county, and He not only knows what’s best for us, He wants it.

Quit ignoring Him. Quit dismissing Him. Quit offending Him.

Please, throw away your “moment of silence” – get a backbone when it comes to standing up for God in this county and exercise some humility by calling on His wisdom and direction through public prayer.

Thank you.

Grand Canyon: Act of God

Ever wonder how the Grand Canyon came into place?

Some claim "a lot of time and a little bit of water" created this phenomenon, but Ken Hamm of Answers in Genesis claims it was "a little bit of time and a great deal of water", and I happen to agree.

Never mind the fact that I'm a Christian and I believe the Biblical account of Noah's Ark and the Great Flood to be true, but current events confirm this geological anomaly is highly probable.

The canyon below was carved out this past week in Durham England as a result of one day's worth of rain.




"Mother Nature" my foot...more like an "act of God". Imagine what 40 days of rain across the whole world would create.

Read the Historical Account of the Great Flood in Genesis 6-8.

There is a God and He Created...

"In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth." Genesis 1:1 NIV

I believe there are two very significant factors that we as a nation have forgotten.

1. There is a God, and
   
2. He created.

If America would once again unabashedly return to this premise, I think we could stand a fighting chance in getting our country back. If not, we're sunk.

Our Founding Fathers recognized the fact that there is a God and that He created mankind with certain inalienable rights. This is clearly laid out in our Declaration of Independence. In fact it is the whole premise behind our breaking from Great Britain. The fundamental truth that we are all created equal is the very foundation of our freedom.

Why on earth have we allowed any reference to God to be removed from our public institutions? And why have we ushered in the notion that "creationism" is not only just a "theory" but in some cases a crock? What are we thinking?

We must get back to recognizing God as the Creator, and more specifically our Creator, lest we as a nation be completely destroyed. Not only do we need to know this truth for ourselves, but we also must teach the current generation as well as the next by incorporating this knowledge back into the Public School curriculum.

TAKE ACTION:

1. Read The History of Creation below right now.
2. Share The History of Creation with your loved ones (children, nieces & nephews) this week.
3. Contact each member of your local School Board and ask that they include The History of Creation in the county schools' curriculum. Explain that it is a matter of preserving our national heritage and the very foundation of our country's future. "...We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights..." - US Declaration of Independence, 2nd Paragraph.
4. Attend the next School Board meeting in your county/community and suggest ways to incorporate The History of Creation into the school system's curriculum (ie. art or essay contest).
5. Write a Letter to the Editor of your local newspaper suggesting the importance of The History of Creation in our way of life in America.
   

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The History of Creation
(Genesis 1:1 - 2:3)
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"In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters." Genesis 1:1-2 NIV

DAY 1: Day & Night
"And God said, 'Let there be light,' and there was light. God saw that the light was good and he separated the light from the darkness. God called the light 'day,' and the darkness he called 'night.' And there was evening, and there was morning -- the first day." Genesis 1:3-5 NIV

DAY 2: Sky
"And God said, 'Let there be an expanse between the waters to separate water from water.' So God made the expanse and separated the water under the expanse from the water above it. And it was so. God called the expanse 'sky'. And there was evening, and there was morning -- the second day." Genesis 1:6-8 NIV

DAY 3: Land & Vegetation
"And God said, 'Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear.' And it was so. God called the dry ground 'land,' and the gathered waters he called 'seas.' And God saw that it was good.

"Then God said, 'Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds.' And it was so. The land produced vegetation: plants bearing seed according to their kinds and trees bearing fruit with seed in it according to their kinds. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening, and there was morning -- the third day." Genesis 1:9-13 NIV

DAY 4: Sun, Moon & Stars
"And God said, 'Let there be lights in the expanse of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark seasons and days and years, and let them be lights in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth.' And it was so. God made two great lights -- the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars. God set them in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth, to govern the day and the night, and to separate light from darkness. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening and there was morning -- the fourth day." Genesis 1:14-19 NIV

DAY 5: Sea & Flying Creatures
"And God said, 'Let the water teem with living creatures, and let birds fly above the earth across the expanse of the sky.' So God created the great creatures of the sea and every living and moving thing with which the water teems, according to their kinds, and every winged bird according to its kind. And God saw that it was good. God blessed them and said, 'Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the water in the seas, and let the birds increase on the earth.' And there was evening, and there was morning -- the fifth day." Genesis 1:20-23 NIV

DAY 6: Land Animals & Man
"And God said, 'Let the land produce living creatures according to their kinds: livestock, creatures that move along the ground, and wild animals, each according to its kind.' And it was so. God made the wild animals according to their kinds, the livestock according to their kinds, and all the creatures that move along the ground according to the kinds. And God saw that it was good.

"Then God said, 'Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.

"So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.

"God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground.
"The God said, 'I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food. And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the the air and all the creatures that move on the ground -- everything that has the breath of life in it -- I give every green plant for food.' And it was so.

"God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning -- the sixth day." Genesis 1:24-31 NIV

DAY 7: God Rests
"Thus the heavens and the earth were completed in all their vast array.

"By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. And God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done." Genesis 2:1-3 NIV
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Whether you consider yourself a religious person or not, I encourage you to take the time to truly reflect on the truth that there is a God and He created everything, including you.

The cosmos did not haphazardly fall into place and you are not some freak accident of nature. You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) and He's got the whole world in His hands.

Share this with your loved ones, your county's School Board and your local community newspaper. Let's get the truth out there.

Do you have some ideas of your own on how to get this message out? Please share them with us, we'd love to hear them.